Man 1: A grasshopper walks into a bar.
Woman: We were talking.
Man1: There was a pause. I thought I’d tell a joke.
Woman: What’s the context? I need context.
Man 1: There’s no context. It’s just a joke.
Man 2: Let him tell the joke.
Man 1: Never mind.
Woman: Just tell the joke.
[long pause]
Man 1: Okay. A grasshopper walks into a bar.
Man 2: Are you sure it’s a grasshopper? Because a cricket looks just like a grasshopper. But grasshoppers are silent, and crickets chirp. Scientists actually call the sound stridulation. Most people think crickets make noise by rubbing their hind legs together, but actually the sound comes from a long vein beneath the wings. The vein has sharp edges—serrations—and when the cricket rubs the vein with its wing, you get the loud chirping sound.
Man 1: It’s a grasshopper.
Woman: Where did you hear this? Is this something stupid you heard on Facebook?
Man 1: I don’t remember where I heard it. It’s just a joke.
[long pause]
Man 1: May I?
Woman: Tell the stupid joke.
Man 1: A grasshopper walks into a bar. The bartender says “Hey, we’ve got a drink named after you.”
Woman: A drink? What the name of the drink?
Man 1: Please just wait.
Woman: I need details. Why can’t you just tell me the name of the drink?
Man 1: You need to wait for it. That’s the joke.
Man 2: Just let him tell the joke.
Man 1: A grasshopper walks into a bar. The bartender says “Hey, we’ve got a drink named after you.” The grasshopper says “Really? You have a drink named Carl?”
Woman: I don’t get it. What does it have to do with the human condition?
Man 2: There’s a drink called a grasshopper. It’s got crème de cacao and crème de menthe. I had one once. It’s pretty good.
Woman: It’s not funny. It doesn’t work.
Man 2: It’s ok.
Man 1: I’m going to read a book.
Woman: Why don’t you stay here with the people?
Man 2: Come back.
Woman: He just wants to stare at his computer.
Man 2: The joke wasn’t bad. The delivery could’ve been better.